Plopping Nigel’s hand down on a scalpel and watching him haphazardly pick it up like a cave man holding a pencil is both effectively hilarious and functionally acceptable. It seems impossible, but, like rubbing your stomach and patting your head, an operational degree of control is gained with a bit of practice. Surgeon Simulator 2013’s clumsy control is more of an endearing hook than a frustrating point of contention. Surgeon Simulator 2013 is a game about experimentation by way of trial and error – and the challenge of competently controlling any of it. ![]() Ribs in the way? Why not try that circular saw looking thing, or maybe that hammer with an axe on the other hand, or what about the giant hacksaw over there in the corner? You don’t even actually have to effectively use the tools merely grazing the intended area breaks the ribs into pieces. Instead, you’re provided with a shit load of cutting tools and forced to experiment with everything. There’s no step-by-step tutorial, no order of operations, and not a single surgical assistant. Upon selecting heart surgery from the secretary’s desk were Nigel presumably works, you’re transported to a prepped patient named Bob and told to perform a heart transplant. The end result here is something akin to QWOP meeting a toy crane game, only you have to use these tools to complete relatively complex life or death procedures. Nigel’s hand moves around with the mouse, with the LMB in control of lowering it and the RMB dedicated to fine wrist movement. Yes, that’s completely insane, and yet also sort of logical position for your hand on a keyboard. ![]() Each of Nigel’s fingers are controlled with your fingers on the A, W, E, and R keys, respectively, while Nigel’s and your thumb is left to the space bar. You play as Nigel Burke, or, more specifically, you play as Nigel Burke’s left hand. Surgeon Simulator 2013 replicates surgery the same way Enviro-Bear 2010 simulates a bear driving a car with one hand and deliberately obtuse control. What it does do, almost in spite of itself, is haphazardly simulate the thrill of ripping a man’s heart out of his chest and replacing it with another one. Hell, I’d even go as far as to say it has a negative influence on your personal knowledge of what invasive surgery actually entails. Still, who wouldn’t mind experiencing the awesome wave of heroic accomplishment that washes over a surgeon each time he or she saves a person’s life? Surgeon Simulator 2013, a game from Bossa Studios, won’t help you be a surgeon. ![]() Most of us are well short of the level of education and subsequent anatomical knowledge required to successfully perform a heart transplant.
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